Random and Ridiculous Shit My Boss Says

inside the mind of an over the top CEO, curated by a sometimes horrified but always entertained Executive Assistant

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Category: lifestyle

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Trump card

  • Posted on April 23, 2018
  • by thomaslascind

You’re like “here. I have tits. What else do you want?”

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  • life goals

spoon

  • Posted on April 23, 2018
  • by thomaslascind

she big spooned me already, so…

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  • in the office

Work goals

  • Posted on October 16, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

So today was awesome because I had a hard on before I even got into the office.

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  • lifestyle

Rule follower

  • Posted on October 15, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

They gave us this huge list of shit we weren’t allowed to do, like 360s and drifts… and so I did all of that.

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  • lifestyle

Come monday

  • Posted on October 15, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

Oh also, you might have noticed that I’m still alive. So that’s good.

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  • life goals

Educational system

  • Posted on August 26, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

Basically Home-EC should teach you to be a skinny whore. The end!

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  • in the office

Crosswords

  • Posted on August 25, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

Boss: what’s the first word you see on this crossword puzzle? me: Professional Boss: Mine was fuckwhore.

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  • lifestyle

Nicknames

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

It’s pretty easy to give him a nickname…. ballsack attack limpwritedshitstabber unclefucker shitfacedcockmaster stinkstarsniffer dickface

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  • life goals

Fatherhood

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

part of the reason i want to have a kid someday is to raise said child wrong.

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  • lifestyle

Music Choices

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

I used to have a strip club playlist. I <3 strippers.

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