Random and Ridiculous Shit My Boss Says

inside the mind of an over the top CEO, curated by a sometimes horrified but always entertained Executive Assistant

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Category: relationship advice

  • random exclamations

when you are outside of your own “range” you are old.

  • Posted on August 14, 2017
  • by thomaslascind
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  • relationship advice

on goals with women

  • Posted on August 14, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

me: you need to have a goal of figuring her out, not just getting along with her boss: that’s impossible. she’s a woman. i can’t figure you bitches out. me:…

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  • relationship advice

spellmurder

  • Posted on August 14, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

boss: i tried to get my witch aunt to spellmurder her me: you should just gunmurder her boss: I almost spell murdered her and then when she was dying i…

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  • relationship advice

on reassurance

  • Posted on August 14, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

So I said…he may like other whores, but you’ll always be his number one cunt.

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  • relationship advice

in the news: Pouty Husband Sends Wife Spreadsheet Detailing Sex-Life Dissatisfaction

  • Posted on August 14, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

me: I could see you doing this boss: I have done that. I have also done that for “fights” or “giving me shit” me: knew it boss: it did not…

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  • relationship advice

apology

  • Posted on August 13, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

She should reply with the offering of an apology BJ… which in my mind is the only way to know if an apology is sincere.

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  • relationship advice

his dating profile

  • Posted on August 13, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

I’d prefer to drink a beer on a beach than just about any other vacation. My life goal is to live on an island or something similar like Costa Rica.…

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  • relationship advice

purse dogs

  • Posted on August 13, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

I have two cats who don’t like or care to get to know any annoying little dogs… if your dogs are little, then they are annoying. You don’t magically have…

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  • relationship advice

so caring

  • Posted on August 13, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

call your friends with your complaints about traffic and your boss, because its stupid and I just don’t give a shit.

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  • relationship advice

long texts

  • Posted on August 13, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

Probably the worst thing I can imagine doing is having a “relationship talk”… if you send me a text that is longer than 3 lines and it isn’t about sex,…

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