Me: (lists actual work tasks) what are YOU doing? Boss: Things in my mind… with women.

Admin Pro’s before hoes!! Happy administrative assistant’s day!!

I feel like a kid who’s mom bought him a nice ice cream cone… only to have someone, some whore, come slap it out of my hands onto the ground

me: are you prepping for your call? Boss: If by prepping you mean surfing the chive and IMing you, then yes.