Random and Ridiculous Shit My Boss Says

inside the mind of an over the top CEO, curated by a sometimes horrified but always entertained Executive Assistant

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Nicknames

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

It’s pretty easy to give him a nickname…. ballsack attack limpwritedshitstabber unclefucker shitfacedcockmaster stinkstarsniffer dickface

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Way to tard out on her

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind
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So you literally fought a bitch

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind
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  • relationship advice

Relationship rules

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

Boss: So i told her she was being dramatic and to shut it and it’s her own fault she had that stupid rule. me: I dont even have words for…

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You hurt my feeling. I only have the one.

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind
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Disappointment

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

I feel like a kid who’s mom bought him a nice ice cream cone… only to have someone, some whore, come slap it out of my hands onto the ground

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Whore.

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind
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  • random exclamations

Well then

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

You might as well be tip tap river dancing all over my soul like an angry child with a sheet of bubble wrap!

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  • leadership advice

Thank you cards

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

Can I write “amazevag” on her thank you card?

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Preparing for an important call

  • Posted on August 21, 2017
  • by thomaslascind

me: are you prepping for your call? Boss: If by prepping you mean surfing the chive and IMing you, then yes.

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