Random and Ridiculous Shit My Boss Says

inside the mind of an over the top CEO, curated by a sometimes horrified but always entertained Executive Assistant

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A friend of the envionrment

  • Posted on February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind

So today, I was doing my part to get us off fossil fuels as well. I was driving my 13mpg v8 in 3rd on the freeway sucking down 91 octane…

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Prius Hate

  • Posted on February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind

The problem is that I see priusi all over the freeway driving like they are better than everyone. Me: Priusi….

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  • while traveling

Hotel Minibars

  • Posted on February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind

When did everyone become such bigots towards minibars. There are none!?

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  • random exclamations

Who came up with the cloud and why are they such a clock hole?

  • Posted on February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind
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Trophy Wives

  • Posted on February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind

I always wondered with the super trophy wives. How many were hot when they got purchased and how many are hot through the sugar-daddy-maintenance?

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He looks like a cross between a hit man and bill gates.

  • Posted on February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind
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  • while traveling

Have you ever listened to your headphones while you piss on a plane?

  • Posted on February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind
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Seating ettiquete

  • Posted on February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind

There’s fucking 26 other chairs bitch. You’re not the court jesters, why are you so close to me?

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  • relationship advice

We are making out. That’s like the international fucking symbol we are together.

  • Posted on February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind
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Shunning

  • Posted on February 11, 2018February 11, 2018
  • by thomaslascind

I just shun her. If you can’t say something nice…. avoid the bitch.

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